Monday, January 2, 2012

Mob Wives: New Year, New War

After sitting through a season of what seemed like 13 year old Jersey girls bickering over bullshiz on Bravo, I'm so happy to see these ladies back on my screen! Oh how I have missed hearing "The Big Bang" by Rock Mafia every week.

Renee, fresh off enough plastic surgery to make a down payment on a nice starter home, makes a visit to good ole Dr. Klapper to get a brand new booty & tummy. From the way she describes what the surgery would entail, I'm not sure I would subject myself to it. More power to you, Renee. It was nice to see A.J. show a little maturity and concern for his mom after watching him be a disrespectful brat last season. When Renee calls Karen after the surgery, we find out things didn't go as smoothly as she would have hoped. Apparently, Renee popped some stitches and lost so much blood she had to have a transfusion. It is safe to say that Renee has officially scared me out of plastic surgery & into the gym. Hopefully, Renee will leave the surgeries alone from now on.
So, it looks like Drita's theme song will continue to be "If I Only Had a Brain" for the second season in a row. She starts off by saying she found out that Lee had cheated on her but he has denied it. Well, duh! This is the same dude who has been locked up for the majority of your relationship AND doesn't even respect you enough to tell you what he's in jail for or how long his sentence is. Now, Drita says she has sought a divorce attorney but has yet to file. From what she tells Carla, she's not speaking to Lee right now but I'm willing to bet he didn't go too long before she was dropping off his groceries at the pen. Didn't Lee cheat on someone else with Drita? Yet she has the nerve to talk about beating up the chick that Lee is suppose to be cheating with. How you get him is how you lose him, boo boo! If I could have sent Drita a Christmas card this year, here's the picture that would have been on the front:
Carla, who has dumped the boyfriend & the husband, has already made it onto Renee's shit list. While Renee was laid up for 16 days in the hospital, Carla only sent 1 text message & Renee is none too pleased. Renee's message to Carla was real simple:
On one hand, I gotta agree with Renee on this one. Carla's excuse is BS. She claims she didn't know how bad things were and that's why she didn't call to check on her. Yet, we hear from Renee that the other ladies in the cast contacted her multiple times during her hospital stay & recovery. You mean to tell me neither Drita nor Karen spoke to Carla during the two plus weeks Renee was in the hospital? Yeah, I'm not buying it. I do agree with Carla when she said that rather than subject herself to such a risky surgery, Renee should have joined her at the gym & adopted a healthier lifestyle. Unfortunately, people have to make their own choices in life and, sometimes, they aren't the smartest ones. While Carla is having lunch with a friend she mentions that Joe, her ex husband, is in a halfway house and has been spending time with the kids. The word 'rekindling' was mentioned and Carla tried brushing it off. I would not be surprised if Carla was out of the loop because she was snuggling up to Joe again.

Drita, Drita, Drita! Why art thou always talking about beating somebody up but we never see you actually do it? Drita is so stressed out about this whole situation with Lee & wanting to bash in the  mistress' head that she decides to take boxing lessons at the gym. Again, she's talking a whole lot about how she use to knock people out back in the day. I recall at least 2 situations last season where Drita had the opportunity to bash some heads but she was all talk. I'm still trying to figure out why this aggression isn't directed at the husband that vowed to be faithful. She does mention that she wants to focus more on being a good mother but, until she drops that dead weight that is stressing her out (Lee), her girls will never get her full attention.

Fast forward to Karen and she confirms my theory that Drita is full of doo doo. We see a text sent to Karen from Drita asking to talk and wanting to bury the hatchet. Yet Karen and her cousin, whom she is lunching with, mention they have heard from several people that Drita has been saying she beat Karen so bad she had to be hospitalized. Understandably, Karen is pissed and is out for blood where Drita is concerned.

To celebrate her birthday and survival, Renee decides to throw a birthday bash. She tells Drita that Carla will not be included on the guest list since she was M.I.A. during Renee's health scare. Drita gives a little more insight into just how much Carla may or may not have cared when she tells Renee she asked her if she had called to check on her. After hearing that aside from the initial text message, Carla never reached out to Renee, Drita agrees that Carla shouldn't be at the party. When Drita mentions that the party will give her an opportunity to talk with Karen, Renee is quick to tell her to stay on the opposite side of the room from Karen. She doesn't want anything ruining her party.
A la Alex McCord on Real Housewives of New York, Drita was given the task of breaking the news to Carla that she would not be on the guest list at Renee's party. Upon hearing this news, Carla goes off. Carla claims she didn't know that Renee was that sick until Drita mentioned it to her much later. Drita claims she was told not to say anything about Renee's condition. Regardless, if that is your and has been your friend for years, what kept you from picking up the phone like everyone else? Just like Renee is still hung up on the fact that Carla's boyfriend touched her inappropriately, Carla is still hung up on the fact that she doesn't believe Renee's side of things.
So, of course Drita and Karen get to the party before Renee gets there. It doesn't help that Karen brought her cousin for backup. Renee walks in and looks great. Renee asks for all of her girls to come to the front but Drita refuses, making it apparent that there is some kind of beef going on. Big Ang (who looks more like Big Angelo in a dress) has to go out and have a pow wow with Drita. Karen's cousin makes her promise to not set it off at the party but, according to the previews from next week, we'll be getting fireworks. My money says that Drita won't come close to sending anyone to the hospital.

What say you, fellow viewers?

5 comments:

  1. I love the picures you used for your recap! Did you see that huge slab of fat and tissue that doctor took out of Renee? It's a wonder she didn't die from that. I love the music on Mob Wives- so much better than the crappy music Bravo has for the RHs.

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  2. The second the doctor described what would happen in that surgery, I would have run for the hills! No way you are cutting me in half unless it involves giving birth or giving a kidney. Bravo is too cheap to pay for licensing, hence the sucky music.

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  3. Great blog !!! I watched the show for the first time last nite....I don't think they realize they look like trailer trash, only with launered & illegal money! Lol It was quite entertaining but confusing. Reading your blog helped me understand the dynamics. Very well written and loved the pics !

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  4. That should have been "laundered". Lol

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  5. Thanks Rhonda! These chicks are a hot mess. They make the housewives look like Disney princesses.

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